A letter to teachers everywhere

I wish that all teachers knew the impact they have on kids lives. My youngest is finishing his last year in primary school. With all my other kids, this was a very emotional thing to go through. Well guess what? This time it isn't. It is as though this year was the year that the teachers wanted to show the parents and kids that they are the boss, and there's nothing you can do about it.

Every year the grade 7's had the privilege of having a special shirt that they could wear on Fridays, well not this year, the school just decided that the kids won't have any. They decided on a new demerit system. If your diary is in your bag and not on your table, guess what? Two points demerit for you! If you write too slow in the exam and don't finish your paper, guess what? Sorry, another demerit for you. It's not hard to get to twelve demerit points, and then you'll have detention. Of course then the teacher will tell you how you're wasting their Friday afternoon. I know my child didn't sit detention and didn't get too many demerits, but this letter is for every boy and girl out there who has been bullied by teachers.

I believe that if a child is not behaving he should be punished! Every action has a reaction. The problem I have is when educators try to catch kids doing something wrong. If you didn't paste your paper in your book it's worthy of a demerit. What happened to talking to kids? Why do educators feel the need to show they have power over kids. Guess what? We know that, you've got our kids for long times during the day. We know that if we complain you will let it out on our kids. What can we do? You win!

Thanks for making my son and the whole grade 7 class of 2014 feel like the worst class you ever had to teach anything to. Thanks for breaking their self confidence, for trampling on their dreams, for sending them to high school with a low self esteem.

Next year with the new grade 7 group please try the following:

• Accept the good in them before you decide they are worthless
• Understand that they are kids, not adults
• They are looking up to you for guidance, don't step on their souls
• A child will listen to a soft voice and rebel against harshness
• They are doing everything in their power to please you
• Last but not least, this is their last year, please let them be kids and have some fun

I know there are wonderful teachers out there. Thank you so much for your love and dedication. This letter is not about you.

I love my children. I will do anything for them. I will pick up the pieces and put them back together again. You know why? For I am a mom, and I am my children's mom. (Oh yes, and don't forget I also am a teacher. I hope and pray that I won't ever treat a child the way our children was treated this year.)

 

 

 

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My daughter, my hero

I have no words to describe the feeling I got when I saw my daughter for the first time in nearly seven months. I was in transit for almost 24 hours, I wasn't sure what time it was supposed to be - but boy I was so happy to see her. When I got out of the car and she came rushing down the stairs I new it was the right decision to go visit her. The first thing I noticed was how grown-up she became. She was the one who asked me if I was hungry, do I need anything, can she make me something to drink? She made me the most wonderful chicken salad and best cup of coffee I've had in a long time.

Because she new everything and I was the one not knowing anything, it quickly became clear that the dynamics of our relationship was going to change. She would be hurrying for the subway and I was just trying to stay close. How was I supposed to know that behind those closed doors was a staircase leading to trains parked underneath New York City? I was amazed at how strong my daughter is, it is something I never had the chance to witness here in South Africa. Here it was easy to always know where she was and what she was doing. Now I can only pray that she will make the right choices, and you know what? She is doing absolutely wonderful!I would not have been able at the age of 21 to fly to another country, settle in and make friends. She became my hero ....

We only had two weeks together, it really was too short. Do I plan to go again? You bet. Would I do something's different? O yes, I would definitely book as a hotel for a few nights in New York instead of taking the subway from West Nyack every time. I would still walk forever in Central Park, run in the rain and loose my sandal, struggle with configuring dollars to rands. But most of all I would love to spend time with my daughter again .....

Love you Chanél ;-)

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I'll pick myself up and try again

It's true, I just stopped writing for nine months! I can't even say that I was pregnant, it would have been wonderful to have something to show after all this time. The only thing I have to show is a hurt ego. I thought it would be easy to start a blog. I like reading other people's blogs, surely it would be easy to start my own ...... Then I woke up from my dream.

I would love it if the words could just flow from my fingers. Unfortunately, everything has to be connected to my brain. Sometimes I would write something over and over, just because it didn't sound right. Yes, I have a little OCD - how did you guess?

The last time I wrote something, my kids were just starting the new school year. The year is just about finished now. My youngest is on his way to high school, that brings along a whole new set of  rules and changes in all my perfect planning!

One of the best things this year was going to New York to visit my daughter. She went over on 1 December 2013 and at the end of June this year I got the chance to visit her. What an adventure - mom and daughter alone in the Big Apple!

Everyone warned me about the heat that time of year. Boy it was hot, I really wasn't prepared for that. I thought I was going to melt. Even with all the heat, the sore feet, the running for trains on the subway (why is everyone in such a hurry?) and the incredible exhaustion, it was so worth it.

Now it's back to reality. I'm really going to try my best, I will get my blog going. I really enjoy writing everything down and then reading it at a later stage and seeing how things have changed in the end.

I will go into more detail about New York, the flight over, the crying and the laughing! Thank you for reading my blog and taking the journey with me :-)